Ten things I loved in October

A life appreciation post and a few recommendations

October was a dynamic and mixed bag. I experienced some of my worst and best days in months. Perhaps that’s because they go hand in hand, the highlights standing out against a dull and dark background as stars in a night sky. I want to pay more attention to those moments that sparkle.

Have you seen this recent trend on social media where people share reels with their glimmers? Glimmers are the opposite of triggers. They’re the things that take us out of our fight or flight response, small moments that spark joy or peace that can help cue our nervous system to feel safe and recover from stress. I first thought these videos were pretty cliché because they all featured the same things: taking a walk in nature, lighting a candle, slow-brewing coffee, or curling up with a book. But I guess clichés are clichés for a reason: they’re often true.

I looked through my camera roll and calendar to find my glimmers of the past month and ended up with ten things that brought me peace and joy, pulled me into the present moment, and gave me the feeling that I was alive. I like to cherish these moments and write them down to reflect on when I have a low day. So, this is a life appreciation post with a few recommendations woven into it. Without further ado, here are some of my sparkles and glimmers of the past month. And I’d love to know: what were your highlights of the past month?

1. On a regular Monday night, Mr. Handsome and I went to see the movie Past Lives. I loved the spontaneity of going to the cinema on a weekday; it was such an uplifting start to my week. The movie was stunning as well. It is about our choices for one beautiful thing over another, which leads to complex pain. Not the pain of a wrong choice but that of realising that two beautiful things sometimes exclude each other. Every dialogue, facial expression, and drawn-out silence in Past Lives emphasises that pain. The complexity of emotions accompanying the lives we’ll never live shines through the screen. With its long shots and slow pace, I found the whole movie breathtakingly beautiful.

2. I hosted my first women’s circle again after my burnout. I love these containers where we hold space for each other as women to just be. Being our most feminine, powerful, and emotional selves is an act of resistance in a world where so many women feel the need to be more of something they’re not. For me, it’s often being more outgoing than I am, especially in work situations. What are you trying to be more or less of to be accepted or valued?

3. I cleaned out my closet. Sounds boring, I know, but it was genuinely fulfilling. There’s something about autumn that makes me want to organise and declutter before we enter winter. Here are a few tips if you’ve been toying with the idea of decluttering your closet. First, remove all your summer clothes, which you definitely won’t wear for the next 4-5 months. Go through them one by one and ask yourself the following questions:

• Did I wear this item this past season? If not, am I ever going to wear it again?

• Does it still spark joy and make me feel good if I wear it?

If the answer to these questions is no, thank the item and put it in a sell/donate box. If the answer is yes, make sure the items are clean and put them in a box for next year. Then, on to your autumn/winter clothes with the same questions. If there are a few items that you hardly wear but find it hard to part ways with, you can put them in a maybe-pile. Store them for 30-60 days and see if you miss them. If you don’t, you can sell/donate them after all. After this selection process, I fixed up a few cardigans that had small holes in them, and I polished all my shoes. Now, my wardrobe feels brand spanking new, and after going through all my items one by one, I feel like I have so many things to wear.

4. Despite my ‘new’ wardrobe, I wore the same outfit half the time this month. This outfit, which isn’t new at all, consists of my favorite pair of jeans and an old navy woolen sweater from Mr. Handsome. I threw the outfit together when I needed comfort, and I’ve barely taken it off ever since. The combination of the warm natural materials and the loose fit makes me feel as if I live in the countryside and am always ready to step outside to get some squash or kale from my imaginary vegetable garden. The sweater also was the perfect companion for the onset of colder days. It makes the cold mornings in my apartment much cozier, and when the sun breaks through, it is just warm enough for a brisk walk without a coat. There’s something about going for a walk without a coat at this time of year that makes me feel alive.

5. I went for a bike ride with a friend and was reminded how much I like to do that. About a year ago, I bought a gravel bike, and I sadly have to admit that I just use it far too little. Nature is so beautiful this time of year and changes so quickly. We had quite a few dreary days with endless rain, but those only made me appreciate this ride on a dry and sunny autumn day even more. I love the crispness in the air, the changing colours and the nuts and mushrooms scattered around the forest. If those are paired with stopping for pancakes, I’m one happy human.

6. Interviewing my dear friend, Caroline, made for such a rich conversation and a beautiful post. You can find her story here.

7. I put my down duvet back on the bed. Bedding-wise, nothing beats a duvet cover, in my opinion — the feeling of curling up under a fluffy down duvet in a cold room can’t be matched. I wish I could sleep under it all year long, but it’s just too warm in the summer months. So, I do a little happy dance every year when I put it back on. I made the most of it by showering before jumping into bed that night with a book and a cup of tea — so good.

8. I’ve been baking lots and lots of banana bread. My basic recipe is 150 grams of a mixture of almond meal and/or ground oats, one teaspoon of baking powder, three ripe bananas and three eggs. Blitz the eggs and the banana together, add the dry ingredients and whatever else comes to mind. In summer, I love adding raspberries, lemon zest, and coconut flakes. Right now, my favourite is subbing one banana with pumpkin puree and adding grated carrot, walnuts and raisins. Let your imagination run wild and eat it plain, toasted, for breakfast or as a snack. You can even freeze it if you want, but mine never lasts that long.

9. This past weekend Mr. Handsome and I went on a spontaneous trip to France. We thought we would both be too busy with work to join his family on their annual trip, but in the end, we decided that there is no better time than the present to enjoy life. So on Wednesday, we hopped in the car and drove to the Bourgogne, where we spent a long weekend eating mostly croissants and French cheese, going for hikes during the dry spells, playing games next to the fireplace when it was raining, and ‘camping’ inside the remains of an 18th-century castle. What’s not to love?

10. It’s a bit sappy, but number 10 will be writing this post. I know that practising gratitude works. Research has proven that it can lower levels of depression, lessen anxiety, and increase life satisfaction and self-esteem. Despite these clear benefits, after years of keeping a daily gratitude journal, writing down three things I’m thankful for can feel like a bit of a chore. Looking back over my calendar and photos of the past month to reminisce its best moments instantly fills me with warmth and, yes, gratitude.

✍🏼 What were your warmest memories of this month?